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Stuck In A Spiral?

“When you’re stuck in a spiral, to change all aspects of the spin, you need only to change one thing.”

-Christina Baldwin

Ever feel like your life is like that movie Groundhog Day?  In the movie, Bill Murray gets trapped in a spiral where he relives the same day over and over.  what I’m talking about is getting trapped in situations or circumstances that impede your ability to live your dream, over and over again.

The quote by Christina Baldwin eloquently captures a lesson from my 10 step system about change and perspective.  My metaphor is the kaleidoscope, but the message is the same; change one thing and you’ll change everything.  The simplest, but often more challenging place to start is by changing your perspective on the situation.

Can you:

  1. See the learning in it?  As painful as this may seem, EVERY situation has a lesson in it for us;  even the painful ones.  What can you take away from this experience that strengthens you?  What did you learn about yourself or the others involved?
  2. Do one thing differently? It doesn’t have to be a full-scale change.  Simply, start by changing one aspect, and then another.  Eventually, you’ll have made a significant change – collectively.
  3. Believe that things can be different? Changing your mind changes everything.  If you don’t believe it can be different, you’re guaranteeing that it won’t be.  But if you believe that change is possible, you’ve at least left the door open for something new.

Could you benefit from a free jump-start chat?  Schedule yours here.


Feeling Like You Can’t Catch A Break?

This is a real mindset challenge; as most things are.

When we feel like we can’t catch a break, we’re usually right. In fact, by believing that, you make it a “done deal.”

Here’s the metaphysical aspect of this, whatever it is you believe, you are likely to see unfold in your life. The old adage says, “Seeing is believing.” I like to flip that around to say:

“Believing is seeing.  “What you believe will direct what you see.

Think about it, when you are feeling low, overwhelmed, or in crisis, what do you usually see? More things that seem to be going wrong. And when you are feeling on top of the world, you notice more glorious things. The key here is not to get stuck in a low vibration and to have a mechanism to shift you up to a higher, more productive vibration.

Here are a few tools that I share with my clients for moving out of a stuck place:

1) Get moving, literally.  

Engaging the physical body also helps shift emotions and intellectual stagnation.  So, take a quick walk, or go exercise, or if you can’t leave the office, turn on some music that makes you dance and dance behind closed doors for 10 minutes.  It will really help.

2) Find a reason to laugh.

Buy a season of your favorite sit-com and keep it handy. Watch a half-hour and shift the mood. Laughter is on the same vibration as prayer. Go for the belly laugh and get out of the funk.


Ok, you may not think you have a great singing voice but it doesn’t matter. When we sing (especially songs with a good message) our hearts open. So sing a song that lets you surrender the negative feelings or sing a song that makes you smile. In either case, you’ll feel differently afterward.

Do You Have A Spot?

Can you take a minute? I found this beautiful spot when I was in DC – and took a minute…to breathe… to feel the sun on my skin…to be grateful.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Can you “take a minute”? Do you have a “spot”?

Biggest Blind Spot? Accepting Your Talent As Worthy

We create so much challenge for ourselves when we deny what is true.

We diminish the value of what comes easily to us, because it comes easily to us and therefore, can’t be worth much, right? Only things that take a long time, cost a lot of money, and are complex to create are worth a lot, right?
What we’re forgetting when we think this way about our gifts and talents, is that to other people, what we do with ease could take them a long time, cost lots of money to duplicate and be difficult to create.
Just how do you determine if you’re selling yourself short?

Here are 3 symptoms of selling yourself short:

1) People love your work, in fact, you may be getting all your new clients by referral, AND YET you’re barely scraping by financially.
2) You are the person that people come to, to “get things done.” The effervescent “yes” person.
3) You can’t seem to catch up and you’re exhausted.

What are the action keys?

1) You have to put a more accurate price value on your work.
2) You must honor the value of your time. You have to say ‘no’ to something. Make it the things with the lowest priority on your personal list. This may be hard for people with a pleaser temperament, but if you leave this unattended, the result is number 3 above, exhaustion.
3) By taking corrective action with 1 and 2 above, you’ll begin to create more space in your life; which means you can opt for a slower pace and more rest.

I know that I make it sound so simple. It is simple but not easy, that’s why we all need help, support, an objective point of view. Find one, better yet, find a few trusted minds who also have “believing eyes” for you; and put them together in a room as your advisory group.  Meet quarterly and then let me know how it’s working for you. I love hearing success stories.

What Triggers You?

Pay attention to what triggers you. What fears get raised? What emotions get called up? Are they realistic? Like, are you triggered by price points that you could easily absorb? How old is that? Is it even yours? ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

Tiggers are signals of misalignment. The follow-up question is what do you need, or need to do, to correct it? (Hint: At this stage, it is not about what someone else needs to do. It’s what steps you need to take to feel better. ie take a break…speak up…new job…healthier food…)

Insist on Yourself. Never Imitate.

I woke up this morning to a difficult note, seemingly out of nowhere, from someone that I love. I started to doubt myself…questioning what I had felt to be true. I wanted to seek confirmation from others that what was in the note wasn’t accurate. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

I was in the process of reminding myself that seeking outside confirmation is just a band-aid. The real fix has to come from within. I have to know my truth…⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
I was reaching for some tape when I saw the spine of Emerson’s book, Self-Reliance. I opened it directly to the passage that I shared in this post. No, there are no coincidences. It was exactly what I needed. Thank you, Mother, Father, God.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
As I am constantly repeating to my clients (and really to myself), I must choose; either I believe the Universe has my back or I don’t. No flip-flopping. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Trust yourself and the divine energy that runs through you.?

Why You Have To Name Your Expertise

Then lead with it!

People love experts.

They love experts who specialize in what they need when they need it. Everyone, yes everyone, has expertise. It may not be credentialed or certified but it’s something you do with precision and success over and over again. Want to know how to name yours?

1)  Think about what you do in your workday, especially those repetitive tasks. Which are you really good at? Which do you also enjoy? Those tasks/actions that you are really good at AND enjoy point you to the name of your expertise.

2)  Refine that expertise. Clean up the language and think about how you can leverage it in your sales communication.

It’s not enough to just be really good at something because without the enjoyment your sales process becomes ten times harder. Have you ever tried to sell something that you were lukewarm about? Have you ever had to listen to someone try to sell something that they felt lukewarm about. PAINFUL.

Do yourself and your potential clients a favor, name your expertise. Then lead with it.

If you want to learn how to refine your expertise and turn it into a value proposition or use it to create a conversation-starting introduction, sign up for free jump start chat.

Reclaim Your Energy and Time


Star Trek

I don’t know about you, but I am constantly looking for more time in my life and ways to prevent energy drains. Not too long ago, I realized that I was using a lot of energy worrying about other people’s lives and taking on more mental responsibility than was really mine to take on. I am learning how to mind my own business and allowing other people to mind theirs. It means that I practice not judging and not projecting my thoughts, or expectations into someone else’s journey – uninvited. And even when invited, I am choosing to be mindful, about not violating what the Star Trek Federation called the prime directive or unnaturally altering their course of another society.  I have to be careful about unnaturally altering another’s path through my thoughts and actions. This is tricky because I believe we’re here to help each other. So, how do I handle it?

Tip 1:  Listen to the story – once.

This is polite if you have the time and inclination.  And everyone needs to release. But, don’t get dragged into a saga over and over again. This is code for complaining and blaming – prime victim mindset.  You don’t want to go to that party. Decline the invitation.

Tip 2: Ask the person,”What they would prefer to what they are currently experiencing?”

This, of course, is a redirection from what’s “wrong” to what would be “better.” It is immediately more empowering. It activates the pre-frontal cortex or higher functioning part of the brain as opposed to the lizard brain, which is all about survival. (My thanks to Seth Godin and his book Linchpin for the lizard brain reference.)

Tip 3: Ask the person, “How they believe you can help them ?”

This is the most important tip as it relates to personal responsibility because now the person is going to lay out specifically what they need – in their opinion,  and you get to decide (fully empowered) “how” or, “if at all” you will participate in their request.  No guessing, no projecting, just actionable decision-making and a little easier breathing.